Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Some Random Thoughts...

I consider myself a neutral person. I don't know if I brought this up earlier. Many thoughts travel through: negative, neutral, positive...

I think good and bad about myself and others.
Here are some random thoughts in their negativity/positivity level:

Negative:
- I think of myself as a "useless, lazy fatass". I usually think about how much I hate my life and would want it to end.
"I'm nothing but trouble..."
"Why do I try and live alongside others...?"
"Nobody understands me."
"I just want to die right here and now."
"I wanna shoot myself, I wanna fall off from a height and die, I wanna slit my throat etc..."

(NOTE: These thoughts are... um... kinda brutal... And they usually come to mind when I'm not in a good mood, so... Don't tell anyone, OK?)

Neutral:
- I think of myself as a good person who hates his own life. I usually come up with something like:
"I am pretty useless, but I also have something to live for..."
"I don't like it, but I have no other choice."
"I guess I'm not all that bad... Although I act like an idiot..."
"Why am I so childish?"

Positive:
- I calm myself down with good thoughts, like how I'd help in a certain situation, how I'd take responsibility or something.
"I am me. I can accept myself as who I am."
"Life is interesting. I wanna see more of it..."
"There are still things I'd like to do..."

Guess I feel a bit better now...

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